The Salties Episode Four

Check out our upcoming 3-day deep dive event, Transform Your Type Live: Emerging Leaders


  1. I cannot even say how much I enjoy your short videos! There’s something about learning about issues we all face in one way or another, not just in theory, but through your real life examples, that is truly remarkable. During every single episode I’ve had at least one major AHA moment. Please keep them coming, and please keep talking about your relationship; it is wonderfully transformative!

  2. maggie fraser says:

    Great talks! Just feel like I need to bring up that as a relational psychotherapist I experience that connection and transformation very often in my work. I learned It from my own psychotherapist in relationship with her. Therapy can fit right in with what you are talking about.

  3. Chiméne Lee says:

    Thanks for sharing this. I appreciate your openness with each other and the authenticity of what you share.

    I agree that past traumas CAN be transformed and healed thru “corrective experiences” in current relationships, be it with our own partner, or with dear friends. I say that both as a therapist, professionally, and as a family member, personally.

    However, it’s also the sad case that some people’s past childhood trauma is so great that the ONLY way they feel “safe enough” is to pull back completely from certain relationships and cut-off all contact with the ones who “trigger” the original wounds. It’s not our place to judge such actions, particularly if we have not experienced the same level of trauma they have, but I do think it’s important to name.

    It’s a complicated process in some families and I speak from experience. I think it sounds lovely to have open-hearted presence and healing in all relationships, but for some people past trauma sadly continues to be the narrative for one’s present story.

    May all beings find peace in their hearts. Thanks , again, for your sharing. 🙏💕

  4. Thank you, Ben and Kerena, for your honesty. I’m loving the series and the deep dives into how to better understand myself and my relationships with my husband, my family, and my friends through your real-life experiences. “This is how it happens in our life” works better for me than a textbook lesson, so bless you both for sharing aspects of your joyfully messy, loving relationship so that others may better understand theirs.

    In this video, I especially love how you discuss the “rewiring” and healing that can occur when subconscious hurts from your past can be worked through in real-time relationships with people who are also engaged in their own emotional growth. This is the principle that keeps me working on myself today using dynamic tools like the Enneagram rather than psychotherapy (which I’ve also used for many years in the past, so no disrespect to the wonderful therapists who have helped me understand and come to terms with other serious life issues in my earlier years. You were all angels and lifesavers!).

    But I’ve found that the Enneagram helps me to better understand and appreciate the people in my life–people with their own life issues and with their own distinct characteristics and modes of being in the world. I’m more patient and loving, in part because the Enneagram has explained some people’s behavior in a way that I can understand.

    As for suggestions for future episodes: How do you deal with betrayal and forgiveness in relationships, and not just between life partners, but between family members or friends?

    Looking forward to Part 5!

Speak Your Mind


Facebook Comments


Google+ Comments

Powered by Google+ Comments